One of the questions survivors are often asked after leaving an abusive relationship is: “Didn’t you realise what was happening?”. Abusive relationships are rarely as obvious from the inside as they appear from the outside. In reality, many survivors spend months or years questioning themselves, doubting their instincts, or believing they are the problem

Many survivors of sexual abuse experience shame, guilt, confusion, or self-blame after trauma. Even when somebody logically knows the abuse was not their fault, emotionally it can feel very different. Because trauma affects far more than thoughts. It affects the nervous system, identity, relationships, and sense of safety in the world.